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Vito Prosciutto: Teaching community college math on the road to a PhD.

Thursday, May 13, 2004

13:23
Robot vacuum cleaners 

One of the items on our wedding registry is one of those Robot vacuum cleaners. There's a new one out for $1800 (the one I want is only $200), so I was looking at some of the reviews to see what the $1800 one does that the cheaper ones don't. I'm assuming that the $1800 one doesn't have this problem:
Roomba may be excellent at vacuuming up after me, but I think mine developed some sort of conciousness because I noticed more and more that it wasn't vacuuming but using it's little sensors to memorize my daily patterns. I'd notice it just looking at me from the doorway and I started calling in to ask questions. Roomba didn't like this and disapeared for a few days. That's when weird stuff started happening. I noticed objects in the path of my daily routine, found little piles of dead bugs just left around the house like a warning, and I'd wake up to weird pounding sounds.

When roomba finally returned it was different. The little green activation light was red. I thought it needed to be plugged in. I noticed more and more that roomba would continually run into the table if I left sharp objects out. Seeming to try for hours to get it to fall onto the floor. I thought it was all very funny until one night, I was in the bath tub, listening to the radio. I heard a tapping sound, and looked over to see roomba trying to knock the radio into the tub. At that point I was worried, so I took out the batteries. The next morning Roomba and it's AC adapter were gone.

Just be careful, these things will fight for their own lives!

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